Ned Pepper's Outrages

Saturday, July 16, 2011

Some Distasteful Things and People: Volume 22

Ned thought he would regale his many fiends with a preliminary list of some of the many things he finds distasteful and even repugnant. In no particular order, they are:
* Jackasses who shave/brush their teeth in a public shower
* Dog owners in general, especially those who say such things as 'I need an SUV because I have dogs.'
* Grotesquely obese people who order grande and vente sugary, high-fat drinks at Starbucks. God knows what they get up to at low rent places like 7-11 and McDonald's.
* The same fat people who wear tight-fitting clothing, aggressively putting their grotesqueness on display for all to see.
* People who drive around in parking lots waiting for a parking place near the door of a store.
*People who sit in idling cars talking on their cell phones.
*People (regrettably mainly those of the female persuasion) who can't shut up.
* People who must make a show of their mindless multitasking, such as women, pushing a baby carriage, while walking a dog and talking on a cell phone.
* Anyone who believes that the GOP makes any sense or is relevant to the 21st century any more.
* Cities that continue to raise Ned's property tax year after year.
* People with multiple children in public schools who expect people like Ned to pay their entire cost to educate their brats. Ned would withdraw this objection if the educatees showed any signs of actually absorbing any of the education.
* Men who run the hot water continually while shaving.
* Grotesquely fat people who ride around in motorized carts in grocery stores.
Ned wishes his friends a very good day.

1 comment:

  1. Some general inconsequential miscellany:
    *Having just seen "True Grit" I finally get Ned Pepper, at least superficially.
    *Jackasses who shave/brush their teeth...
    I've seen some odd things but never anyone shave their teeth; maybe Bigfoot?
    *'I need an SUV because I have dogs.'
    I know someone who just got some kinda Toyota mini-tank. When I asked about the purchase she said she needed it for her (3)dogs. She did not mention her husband.
    *Re: cell phones, multitasking & driving: A couple of days ago I pulled up to an intersection and waited for the driver with right-of-way to proceed. Driver did not proceed. Eventually a driver in line behind her gave her some encouragement and as she pulled through the intersection, at about 5 miles an hour, I noticed she was on a cell phone and continued her snail-pace and very important call through the intersection and on down the road seemingly unaware and unaffected by anyone else on the road. I thought about t-boning her car and claiming innocence based on the fact that her behavior made me insane. But realized that I'd end up being the bad guy.
    You shall hear more anon ...

    ReplyDelete