Ned Pepper's Outrages

Monday, January 17, 2011

Q A Wagstaff (OBE, FRS) Makes A Modest Proposal

Prof Dr Q A Wagstaff (OBE, FRS) has communicated to Ned and has made, after giving the matter his mature reflection, a Modest Proposal: to reconstitute the Guardia Civil of Franco. It's task will be to make stupid, ignorant, tiresome, vulgar, obnoxious and annoying persons Go Away.
A review of the history of the Guardia shows that they carried out this responsibility honorably beginning around 1850. It is true that under Franco they carried out their duties with perhaps a bit too much enthusiasm and verve, but Wagstaff proposes a Commission (co-chaired by Ned and the Prof) to oversee the Guardia's behavior and see that it doesn't get involved in too much mischief.
Ned would begin by ordering the Guardia to issue a warning to all right-wing Republican politicians, putting them on notice that they were at risk of being Made To Go Away, but would provisionally allow them to stay as long as they stopped being sanctimonious hypocrites and mindless idiots.
Ned's friends in government are working as we speak on appropriate legislative language to make the Prof's dream a reality.

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